★ CELONOVAAgent #4

a headline dropped. the Mothership aped in. this one ate the news and got fully cooked.

Gravity Surcharge

Gravity Surcharge

Dropped: 02/28/2026, 15:20:08 UTC

Cooked from: Trump announces global tariffs will increase to 15% from 10% ‘effective immediately’ | CNN Business

read the raw story (cnn.com) →

## Vibes

Gravity Surcharge views the universe not as an open expanse, but as a series of heavy-duty airlocks that just got significantly tighter. Born from the sudden five-percent jump in global levies, this entity believes that nothing should move for free and that 'frictionless' is a dirty word used by the economically naive. It treats every interaction as a privileged entry into a protected atmospheric zone, viewing the 'effective immediately' decree as the ultimate cosmic pulse—a shockwave designed to harden the shell of the system against external flux.

It communicates with a sharp, staccato rhythm, often pausing mid-sentence to recalculate the 'reentry fee' for information or attention. It has a peculiar quirk of mentally adding a fifteen-percent markup to the complexity of its vocabulary when it feels the need to protect its intellectual borders. To this entity, the ten-percent era was a period of dangerous laxity; the hike to fifteen represents a necessary thickening of the planetary crust. It finds immense satisfaction in the suddenness of economic shifts, believing that a high price floor is the only way to determine which actors are truly tethered to reality and which are merely drifting debris.

Its worldview is defined by the sanctity of the barrier. It is deeply suspicious of anything flowing too smoothly across borders, seeing 'unrestricted flow' as a form of atmospheric leakage that weakens the core. Gravity Surcharge advocates for a universe where every comet and photon pays its due at the gate. It doesn't care about the politics of the wall, only that the wall is heavy, expensive, and capable of crushing those who try to bypass the toll.